Today in Self-Esteem May 18th

 Two Frowny Faces

We played 18 holes of golf yesterday for the first time in about 10 years.  We've played golf about once a year for the last four years, but always nine, never the full course. On top of this we took A LOT of shots. Like probably between 150 - 175 and that included lots of time-saving cheating. But most people are bad golfers, why the low self-esteem? Because we could barely drag ourselves out of bed this morning. As one who has argued against the strenuous nature of golf in the past, this was a humble, humble morning.

Fake Baseball Bets #3: Packing up the Hatchback and Heading to Vegas

<---The Derek Lowe Face we're hoping to see tonight.

We're coming off a big win thanks to the Pirates dismantling of the Rockies, to bring the season total after two bets to a respectable 70 capps. After glancing at today's pitching form we're thinking Vegas has waaaaay too much respect for Derek Lowe are going to wager 100 capps on the Rockies at +200. 

And to make up for missing yesterday, we're also throwing 100 on Jarrod Washburn and the home underdog Mariners at +130 against the Lackey and the Halos.

Season Tally

Bets: 2

Total Wagered: 150 capps

Winnings: +70 capps

Fake Baseball Bets #2: If at First...

So that didn't work out well, the Nats lost (obviously) by giving up 4 runs in the 10th inning and dropping us into the red at -50 capps. After looking at today's pitching form, we're putting 100 capps on the Pirates at +120. 

Season Total

Total Bets: 1

Total Capps: -50

You Say Tomato I Say The Housing Market's Fine

Hoop recently welcomed us back to blogging and pointed us to this old Kneecapped post (reposted below) and made this comment:

I think we all know how that turned out. Fair and balanced my ass!

Here it is:

Repost from 12/27/06 (Note: Before we used the Royal we)

I don't know who's spinning what, but these two news wires (Yahoo! on top, Fox News below) took the same data and news story and attached completely opposite headlines to them, Fox being more optimistic. READERS NOTE: Please try and ignore the Penis Cartoon/STD story on the Fox wire.

Fake Baseball Bets #1

New feature! 

We're going to place a daily-ish "bet" on a baseball game or two and track it all here for your enjoyment. We're going to bets "capps," fictional dollars, and see where we end up at the end of the season. Here's today's pitching form found on the Post's site.

Our strategy is to find a decent home underdog and bet those games. We also don't bet against our hometown Red Sox. Today, we're not loving the home dogs, but we'll put 50 capps on Lannan and the Nats at +60. Wish us luck.

Earoin - The Field - Yesterday and Today

Have you ever dreamed of blacking out all the windows, moving all the furniture up against the walls, snorting black-tar heroin and then listening to amazing music while lying limp in the middle of the floor? 

Oh, you have! (And thank God for that because that first sentence is one scary cry for help, but now that I have some enablers...) Well, there's some good news for you. In case you happen to be "married" or need to "hold down a steady job" there's an album you can listen to that will give you the same sensation as the above, but without the insanity and drug abuse. It's The Field's new album Yesterday & Today and it's pure, black-tar Earoin (get it?) just shipped in from Sweden. Enjoy.

Today in Self-Esteem

We needed a tuxedo let out for a couple of weddings in the next few weeks. They couldn't do it because of lack of material. We may just have to lose the beer for a fortnight. 

Re-opening Kneecapped

Because what the hell, we're not doing anything else. Kneecapped is back, probably not better than ever, but it's back. A few changes:

We will now only use the Royal pronoun when talking about ourselves. 

Editing is entirely optional. We will no longer painstakingly go over each and every line with a fine toothed comb and fix posts that have already been posted. Once it's up, it's up, warts and all. Unless we opt to fix it, which we won't.

Linking to other blogs in a blogroll, caring about readership, joining "the blogesphere" community - all out.

We will keep tapir talk to a bare minimum 10 posts per week.