Here's a sign in the baggage claim at LaGuardia Airport:
So far, so good. I am at LaGuardia.
Actual time of photograph: 7:43 PM.Below is a photograph of the most exciting store I have ever seen:
Watch out ESPN Zone and move over The Discovery Channel store because the CNBC magazine shop is in the hizz-ouse, raising the bar for basic-cable-sponsored retail stores everywhere. As soon as you set foot inside its three walls visions of Suze Orman and stock tickers dance in your head. Does it look or feel much different than, say,
It’s not all cupcakes and puppy dogs, however, as rumors are leaking out of
UPDATE: A Kneecapped First Photo Exclusive!
Here's the first photograph of the new C-SPAN store in Washington D.C. and it is causing quite a stir.
Natalie Cole burst onto the Red Carpet at the Grammy Awards looking like a zombie walking out of a botox clinic shortly after getting a boob job. Words do not do this picture justice. The face looks okay, but the rest is just weird.
Our Fresh Direct order came in last night and one box was surprisingly light. Let's see what was in it: 
One box of tea. A box of tea in another box 10 times its size. Nothing else. That seems worth it. The box is recyclable, but really, let's be reasonable here. It’s like the great Mitch Hedberg joke about people who hand out pamphlets on the street, “here you throw this out.”
At least my tea was delivered safe and sound. Wouldn't want that box of dried, crushed leaves getting damaged.
Last night, while sprinting down the Bergen St. subway platform to catch the little G train that stops in the middle of the platform, far away from the entrances, my wife made a funny comparison. The G train is like the short bus.
I have to agree. The G is smaller than normal trains, it doesn’t go into Manhattan (mainstream school?), and acts as an auxiliary train service.
The short bus stops in many different and spread out school districts, picking up students and bringing them to a central (special?) school. The G train rides through Brooklyn and Queens wrangling up hipsters to bring to Williamsburg or yuppies to drop off in Cobble Hill.
The G is also an object of scorn and mockery. When people hear you live on the G train their eyes become glassy. Their expression grows into one of confusion and pity.
So here’s to you G train, don’t let anyone tell you you’re different.
I saw this on Gawker via Rising Hegemon. The War in Afghanistan, is that thing still going on? Apparently, bad news on the War on Terror only sells in foreign markets.
Time counters with this:
This photo makes me feel icky and it dampers my urge to spend money.
I've got nothing today. I'm an empty vessel, a void. But since I'd like to keep this daily here's a summary of Amanda Peet's performance on Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, which can pretty much be summarized by this picture:
Notice the wry, knowing smile. The self confidence that says, "I'm a winner, I know what I'm doing. I will prove you wrong. I’m better looking than you. I’m the good guy.” It would have worked, but then every scene with Amnada Peet ended the same way, with her stupid grin, staring into space.
It finally became a running joke for the show. If this continues it could be good fodder for a Studio 60 drinking game.
Yes, a 6:30 Friday post. I'm trying out a new time slot. TGIF worked for ABC!
Ask anyone who knows me and most will tell you that I had a quite the affinity, er, obsession* with the Wu-Tang Clan in my younger days. It wore off when I reached my early 20’s, mainly because the group couldn’t reach the heights of 1993 – 96, and who can blame them? Not only is that the Golden Age of “East Coast” rap, but they were the coolest, strangest, and most talented group in the bunch. My appetite for all thing Wu-Tang was insatiable: trips into Boston to find WuWear (I didn’t get any), buying any magazine with them on the cover, that awesome (now embarrassing) day when I actually bought a C.R.E.A.M. shirt at Newbury Comics. These were my teenage years, for better or worse. By the time *NSYNC dropped No Strings Attached in 2000, giving birth to a new obsession, the Wu were all but a memory.
Well thanks to MySpace, The Wu-Tang Clan are more accessible than ever. Each member has their own page full of songs new and old. It’s been fun reacquainting myself with them. Their later stuff wasn’t as bad as I once thought, especially in light of the current “rap” offerings. During the past five years, Ghostface, for the most part, has carried the Wu-Tang torch, but I have to say Raekwon the Chef is stepping up his game with these two outrageous photos, enjoy:
This blows my mind. Check the copy of the Robb Report.
This is a new photo, I think it promoting his new album Only Built for Cuban Linx Part II (Which is delayed like all Wu albums)
* As proof of my obsession, while I was posting this very post you just read and enjoyed a co-worker came over and said, "Is that the Wu-Tang Symbol on your desk?" Next to me on my desk was a little doodle I had drawn during a meeting. The doodle was the Wu Tang symbol, still the only thing I can draw.
I'm not one to make fun of other people’s appearance, but my friend sent me this picture from snopes.com today and...holy fuck! I think I just shit my pants.
His name is Brian Peppers. The bad news is, he's a sex offender. The good news is, he's registered.
I've been reading Gawkers coverage of the VMAs and haven't seen anything on MTV's John Norris.
Something has always bothered me about John Norris A.K.A. the poor man's Kurt Loder. Is it his relentless celebrity ass kissing? Or how he tries a little too hard to be cool? Maybe it's his overreaction to the most banal music news of the day? Or that somehow he still works for MTV despite never fitting in with the channel? Well, yeah, all of these things bother me I guess. But what really bothers me is the fact that he looks like the walking dead. Like a zombie, or a skeleton even.
Dear John,
John, stop. Just stop! Go bald, John. You’ve never been a looker. You’ve never been hip. MTV apparently doesn’t care about this. Go bald, John. You're 46 years-old, it's okay, just go bald. Anything is better than this.
Best,
Rick
When I first saw pictures of creepy John Mark Karr I couldn't help but think I'd seen him before. Dead eyes, blank, lifeless, childlike expression (could come in handy for a guy like JMK), thinning hair, frail, meek body. Where had I seen these before? That's when it hit me. Time for another installment of "People Who Look Like People"
JMK looks like a gaunter, sweatier, slightly hairier, and pedophilier version of Karl Pilkington, the funniest man in England today and an absolute IDD-YOT.
No? Time to come clean, I'm not very good at this game.
What if I told you he reminded me of...
No. Really? Then I apologize.
I guess John Mark Karr doesn't look like anyone else. Unless, he's the sweaty man-love child of David Duke and Jeffery Dahmer? I heard Duke played catcher.
If you're still reading and want to read some blog commentary of John Mark Karr that's actually funny go here.
The Daily Dump stole the John Mark Karr media circus. He took the coverage and ran it into the end zone of high comedy. It's hilarious and you should check it out.
The Red Sox were just swept in a five game series by the Yankees. I only have this to say:
Coco Crisp sucks
Josh Beckett sucks
John Lester sucks
Manny Delcarmen sucks
Craig Hansen sucks
Wily Mo Pena sucks
Rudy Seanz sucks
Javy Lopez sucks
Mike Timlin sucks
Keith Foulke sucks
Doug Mirabeli sucks
Alex Cora really sucks
Theo Epstein - The Honeymoon is over
Pedro Martinez, he was pretty good, probably shouldn't have let him walk. Johnny Damon, he was pretty good probably shouldn't have let him walk. Orlando Cabrera, was pretty good too. Why wouldn't you want to go battle the Yankees one more time with these guys? The Sox are done. Now time for a McGinest/Vinatieri-less Pats season. Why can't we keep any of my favorite players. I'm through with sports. I shouldn't be upset because both these teams won the whole thing recently, but isn't that what makes sports fun, complaining. If you don't have that then why follow?
Is Monty Biesel the Coco Crisp of the Patriots or the other way around?
My jaw hit the floor today as I was perusing ESPN.com. Gene Wojciechowski’s latest column claims that Tiger Woods is the greatest individual athlete of all time. Not just the greatest golfer, the greatest athlete. Why, because Woods just polished off the field for his 12th major championship. To start, this column is classic ESPN instant history. If Woods goes into another mini-slump in the next few years you’ll once again be reading the “Tiger Woods Isn’t As Good As He Used To Be” columns Skip Bayless regurgitates all too often. And to be fair Gene knows he’s making a controversial statement and is putting himself out on a limb.
More disturbing than Wojo’s column, however, is how the ESPN.com readers voted Woods as the 2nd greatest athlete of all-time after Michael Jordan. I hate to be this guy, but golf my friends is not an elite sport. Golf, the game itself, does not allow golfers the chance to prove how great of an athlete they truly are. It’s just not what golf is about. It doesn’t challenge the player like other professional sports. This is why I would rank every baseball, basketball, football, tennis, hockey, soccer, track and field, and boxing Hall Of Famer ahead of Tiger Woods, because simply, golf is not as difficult as these sports. I’m sorry to say.
Baseball: Some people look at Babe Ruth and say to themselves “I’m in better shape than this guy” and they’d be right, but hitting a baseball that curves, moves, and travels at speeds of 90+ MPH, while fans scream at you to fail is much, much harder than hitting a golf ball propped up on a tee, motionless, with absolute silence.
Basketball: Simply put, there is no defense in golf. All these other sports pit you against other athletes just as good as you, working to stop you. Michael Jordan played in the greatest era of NBA basketball, and still no one could stop him. Magic, Bird, and Chamberlain could not be stopped whether they had one man guarding them or three.
Tennis: “But golf is mental, you play against yourself, blah, blah, blah.” Well, what about tennis? Tennis players are some of the most conditioned athletes in the world. They play mind games with their opponent and themselves for 3-4 hours while running and swinging mightily. And they have no coaching to help them through the tough times. If you're so impressed with Tiger Woods, take a look at what Roger Federer is doing in tennis. Golf is a mentally challenging game, no question, but you have a caddy who not only carries your bag, but offers advice and encouragement. Make golfers carry their own bag and hit the links on their own, then come tell me about how mentally challenging it is.
I won’t insult football players, hockey players and boxers by comparing the physical nature of these sports with golf, but I think it’s fairly evident. The thought of comparing what a quarterback or linebacker does in the athletic sense to a golfer is laughable.
The reason golf is a popular sport, especially in the upper class and in business circles is because you don’t sweat too much, you can drink alcohol while you play, and you can smoke cigars while you play. Other sports where this is true: croquet, Pro Kadima, hacky-sack, bocce, darts, lawn darts, beer pong, bowling, cards, and horseshoes. Not exactly the most athletic of activities, but they make for one hell of a summer afternoon.
This begs the question, why then does Tiger Woods get more respect at being a great athlete than he deserves? And why does the fan vote support him as well? The obvious answer is that Woods is amazing, charismatic (though not to me) and the greatest golfer of all time, and people like to be associated with greatness. But this doesn’t answer the question completely.
It’s because we can relate with golfers more than most athletes because we play the game and for the most part suck at it. Golf is an expensive, but easy game to play. Grab a partner drive to a course, tee off. Much easier to do later in life than say call up 17 of your closest friends and play nine innings of baseball. And much easier on aging limbs than touch football, tennis, or basketball. We play it and thus respect the athleticism more than we should.
So Gene, you can have Tiger Woods. I'll take Jim Brown or MJ or Ali and mop the floor with you. Tiger is great, but to rank him as the greatest athlete of all time is utter nonsense.
Not to get all Superficial on you, and I don't mean to steal The Assimilated Negro's thunder, but the optical illusion in this photo cracked me up. Doesn't she look like a 6 year-old trying on her mom's high heels?
One quick side note: I don't think this has been discussed enough, how in the world did Lionel Richie's daughter become so famous? One minute our country is reeling in post 9/11 depression and working towards an inevitable war with Iraq, and the next thing you know Paris Hilton releases a sex tape, Nicole Richie leaves rehab, and they appear together on Simple Life. This was a watershed moment. Malcolm Gladwell shoud site this in his next book, because it's been a non-stop parade of vapid celebrities and gossip since. Simple Life turned to Newlyweds and Newlyweds spun into The Ashley Simpson Show which ran alongside Laguna Beach which spun off into The Hills. Each show launching a no talent but slutty star who would become a gossip page mainstay. This all happened around the same time Star and US Weekly went glossy, encouraging normal self-respecting people to buy their rags. Now, we live in a world were a gossip columnist, Perez Hilton, is a celebrity. And, everyone is okay with this? Really?
